people say the dumbest things

Fortunately, I am following the sage advice of my nineteen year old brother. He often tells me to "be the duck; just let it roll you." So I am letting all of of the stupid assvice roll off me, just like a duck. Maybe you would have to be there.

We have some good friends (perhaps after this story I will change that to past tense...had some good friends). The way Paul met them is rather convoluted but he has been friends with them for fifteen years. They are closer to our parents ages so we think of them as our other mom and dad. Or at least I did. Not so much, now. My mother has never said anything this rude to me.

I have never been shy about our IF. We were honest that we were ttc from the get go and five years later it's pretty obvious that we are encountering some difficulties. "D" has usually been pretty sensitive to me and as a former endo sufferer she can be nice and sympathetic. Until now. Ok, obviously I am not doing a great job of letting it roll off me. She was asking us where we we're at in the IF journey and I told her that we were gearing up for an IVF cycle. Her response..."well, don't be too upset if it doesn't work. You need to be prepared for the fact that this could fail." Well, thank you so much for inspiring me with so much hope. She proceeded to then lecture me on how I just shouldn't be upset if this fails. Over and over again. Like a broken record. Aren't you noticeably impressed at my self control for not drowning her in my bottled water.

Both "D" and her husband are chain smoking fools. I wonder if he gets diagnosed with lung cancer first if it would be inappropriate to tell her that he might be cured or he just might die and to not be upset if he does die. Geez! I would never say that. In fact it mortifies me that I'm typing it out but come on. It was the dumbest thing ever to say. If my DE cycle fails then I will deal with it by being upset and I will move on. I am strong like that. I know I am. But it might work and right now, I need to be hopeful. So I am going to be like the duck. Letting it roll off me. And moving on. And having hope.